Roger+and+Julia

Julia was pregnant at the end of the war. When Roger was born Julia asked Dolly to be his godmother. Her life had always been so full and so exciting that she had never had the time to busy herself much with Roger. She worried, of course, when he was ill. She had often thought it would be nice when he was old enough really to share her interests. When they spent time in Taplow Roger was seventeen. He was a nice-looking boy, with reddish hair and blue eyes, but that was the best you could say of him. He had neither his mother's vivacity and nor his father's beauty of feature. Julia was somewhat disappointed in him. As a child when she had been so constantly photographed with him he was lovely. He was rather stolid now and he had a serious look. Julia was very fond of him, but she could not but find him a trifle dull. She exhibited a lively interest in the things she supposed must interest him, cricket and such like, but he did not seem to have much to say about them. She was afraid he was not very intelligent. Roger and Tom spend a lot of time together. Roger understood the situation between his mother and his friend. But he did not speak about it. From the time that he first went to his preparatory school she had seen little of him. It flattered her that there were several photographs of her in his room. He was not so much excited at getting home as she had expected him to be. He was rather casual. He seemed suddenly to have grown very sophisticated. He did not know what he wanted to be. Both Julia and Michael had from the first been obsessed by the fear that he would go on the stage, but he was not interested in it. When there were parties in their house, Roger was very polite to the guests. He did his duty as part host like a man of the world. But it seemed to Julia that he held himself in some curious way aloof. He coolly judging them. She had an impression that he took none of them very seriously. It was such a bore that Roger refused to be photographed with her any more. When Roger arrived from Austria. Julia went to meet him by herself. She tried to look pretty because she wanted Roger to be proud of her. There was indeed a subject that Michael had invited her to discuss with Roger when the opportunity arose. His father wanted him to be lawyer. But Roger said that he wanted to be a priest. Julia could hardly believe her ears. He said that he lived all his life in an atmosphere of make-believe. He wanted to get down to brass tacks. He said that when he was just a kid, he was fourteen, he was standing one night in the wings watching her act. It must have been a pretty good scene, Julia said the things she had to say so sincerely, and what she were saying was so moving, Roger couldn't help crying. He felt terribly sorry for her. And then she had to come to the back of the stage, near where he was standing, the tears were streaming down her face. It was not sincere tears. He believed she meant what she said. When he saw that it was all pretence it smashed something. He has never believed in her since. Julia didn't know the difference between truth and make-believe. She never stop acting. She looked up at him quickly. She shivered, for what he said gave her an eerie sensation. She listened to him attentively, with a certain anxiety, for he was so serious that she felt he was expressing something that had burdened him for years. She had never in his whole life heard him talk so much. He considered that she was fond of him when he was a kid. He thought that she was always glad to see him, but she was thankful that he went his own way. She hadn't got time in her life for anyone but herself." It was very difficult for Julia to listen to Roger. Julia and Michael were not religious people. They wanted another career for their child. They cannot understood his choice. Roger was an odd boy. He was very shy. He loved his family but in his own way. He and his parents lived different lifes.
 * Roger and Julia**